First, imagine Gui.
It is the mist.
It hangs in the air, giving a certain romance to images of the early morning. A dewy ethereal quality to everything around it. Blurring the lines, enhancing the light, softening the hardness.
It also obscures what lies beneath. It is mysterious mist, creating the effect of being both foreboding, and forbidden, tempting and enticing, and yet, uncertain and undetermined. Mist that hides, obscures, plays tricks with the eye.
Mist can roll in…
And as swiftly, it arrives, it departs. A clear cloudless sky left behind.
It can be dense. Thick. Fog.
A pea souper. Smog. Pollution.
Gui is the clouds. Fluffy, white, like sheep floating in the sky.
Shade from the heat. Or a Fierce Thundering Storm.
And there is Gui as Rain.
But rain can be gentle rain. Or Hard Rain.
Bruce Lee said ‘Be Like Water’. It means to make oneself formless, and to fit oneself to the container of the situation rather than be rigid. Although strictly speaking, this applies more to Ren 壬 Water than Gui 癸 Water, Gui also has this measure of adaptiveness, but arguably, a greater measure of adaptiveness because unlike Ren, which must be defined by borders or containment, Gui is like air, it can fill up space, but also seep through the smallest holes, and even permeate through holes that are not there. But it can be O2, or it can be CO2. Deadly. Or life-giving. Clean. Or Polluted.
Gui by necessity in a sense is both formless, and multi-form. It is not defined or determined by a container, but rather, alters its manner or form (rain vs mist, fog vs clouds) and does to at times, without warning, or advance notification.
The nature of the Gui person therefore is chameleonic. They are like the weather, difficult to predict. I would not say impossible to predict because like all things, Gui too has a pattern. Although it not always possible to determine the PRECISION of that pattern, there is a pattern nonetheless. So step one in How to Train a Gui is to realise, it is a case of Predictable Irrationality. (the book by Dan Ariely is also really good). In other words, a dark cloud usually means an umbrella is de rigour, BUT, you’ll never know what will happen.
As such, a critical part of learning how to train a Gui is to first and foremost, be prepared for eventualities. Or surprises. Remember, predictably unpredictable. You might not know where they will go BUT you definitely will have a few ideas. They have old haunts as it were. Places they love to go back to.
The ever-moving nature of the Gui person, and the moodiness (after all, we do say people’s moods are like the weather no?) mean that the person is often impossible to read. Just when you think they are going one way, they end up going the other.
But at the end of the day, mist always gravitates, be it to the ground, or to the mountains. In BaZi terminology, this is the image of Gui 癸 + Wu 戊 . As Gui + Wu is regarded as a non-sentimental combination, this means that the gravitation of the mist to the mountains is limited. Accordingly, the ability of Gui to comply to the Direct Officer (Wu Earth is the Direct Officer Star of Gui Water) meaning FOLLOW ORDERS is limited. The Gui person is a pied piper that follows his or her own tune, someone else’s tune, or no particular tune. So compliance, and the ability to train a Gui, at best, is limited in its efficacious. However, the mist does like to hang out with the mountains and it often keeps coming back. So whilst compliance (read: training) sometimes lapses, fear not, as long as the rules are clearly laid down (read: the mountain is in the same place it WAS before this), Gui will return. And Comply.
And lapse. But then comply again.
So the most important thing when dealing with Gui is to be infinitely consistent oneself.
Secondly, it is to be adaptive TO Gui. This does not to be adaptive like Gui. But adapt to the circumstances. Remember, the weather changes fast. And so a Gui person’s mind and moods alter just as quickly. The key therefore is to catch them when they are on the uptick, and slap on the rules.
Be The Mountain.
Gui will often try to worm out of things and are famous for their convenient memories (the mist, the mist). Thus, CARVE IT IN STONE.Always put things in writing. Make sure there is a record of the conversation. Better yet. Tape record it. Because nothing pisses of a Gui, than to go against their own words, when confronted with it. Failing such an effort, you can betcha the Gui will find a reason to worm out of the situation.
Perhaps the most important lesson in How to Train a Gui, is to realise, they can’t really be trained that much. Non-sentimental combination remember? There are limits to their ability to comply, and to be restricted. “How to you take a cloud and pin it down?” – exactly. So don’t try. As indicated, adapt to Gui. Work around Gui’s inabilities to commit, and Gui’s passion for free-spiritedness. For remember, Gui will always return to the Mountain.
Anticipate the possibilities, observe the patterns, and eventually, you will see the trends emerging. Sure, there will be an occasional El Nino or La Nina, but for most of it, Gui will find the Mountain.
So lay out the Mountain. Carve the Rules in Stone. Leave the Gui no room to escape (remember, air and gas can permeate walls). You can never box them in forever, so leave some leeway for them to move around. Seek not to constrain, but to instead, afford space, and room to breathe.
But always make sure you have A MOUNTAIN. (aka, the rules. the commitment. the clarity. the certainty. the bottom line.)