In the course of putting together my first beginner’s BaZi class, I’ve had to spend a lot of time writing marketing materials. And in so doing, I’ve had the opportunity to revisit some topics which oftentimes, I take for granted because to me, it seems to obvious, the answer to questions like: “Why Learn BaZi?”. I suppose it’s a bit like someone who goes to the gym or works out or asking a personal trainer ‘why go to the gym’ or ‘why have a personal trainer’. We are rather sold on the idea and so don’t really realise the rest of the world doesn’t see what we see.

In any case, whilst writing my answer to the question ‘WHAT SHOULD YOU DO AFTER THE CLASS”, I was endeavouring to figure out what I would say to a class participant who has no intention of going beyond the beginner’s class. What could someone who knows the bare basics of BaZi and has some ability to read a person’s character, be able to do with that knowledge?

It was then that I remembered this very moving segment of the Nobel Lecture by Aung San Suu Kyi, delivered in Oslo on 16 June, 2012 (text) – I have included the video further down for those who would like to hear the words themselves, delivered perfectly by a lady who exudes grace thanks to her Six Elegance Day Master which is 己 未 Ji Wei. In her lecture, Aung San Suu Kyi speaks of the concept of ‘suffering’:

A positive aspect of living in isolation was that I had ample time in which to ruminate over the meaning of words and precepts that I had known and accepted all my life. As a Buddhist, I had heard about dukha, generally translated as suffering, since I was a small child. Almost on a daily basis elderly, and sometimes not so elderly, people around me would murmur “dukha, dukha” when they suffered from aches and pains or when they met with some small, annoying mishaps. However, it was only during my years of house arrest that I got around to investigating the nature of the six great dukha. These are: to be conceived, to age, to sicken, to die, to be parted from those one loves, to be forced to live in propinquity with those one does not love. I examined each of the six great sufferings, not in a religious context but in the context of our ordinary, everyday lives. If suffering were an unavoidable part of our existence, we should try to alleviate it as far as possible in practical, earthly ways. I mulled over the effectiveness of ante- and post-natal programmes and mother and childcare; of adequate facilities for the aging population; of comprehensive health services; of compassionate nursing and hospices. I was particularly intrigued by the last two kinds of suffering: to be parted from those one loves and to be forced to live in propinquity with those one does not love. What experiences might our Lord Buddha have undergone in his own life that he had included these two states among the great sufferings? I thought of prisoners and refugees, of migrant workers and victims of human trafficking, of that great mass of the uprooted of the earth who have been torn away from their homes, parted from families and friends, forced to live out their lives among strangers who are not always welcoming.

I was particularly intrigued by the section underlined above, specifically the notion of being forced to live in propinquity (or nearness, for those of us who need a simpler answer) to those who one does not love.

Many a time, people come to learn BaZi to find out about the people who they care about – the oft stated goal of many people is to help themselves or their family members. Yet I think one of the least considered advantages of BaZi is the knowledge it confers about those who matter in your life, but whom you DO NOT LIKE.

A lot of people have difficulty wrapping their heads around the notion of a person who matters but they do not like. After all, if they don’t like the person, how can this person matter right?

Well, think of it this way – a prisoner does not like their jailer, but the jailer is responsible for delivering their food, letting them out for their exercise and ensuring their experience in prison is not too miserable. The jailer is not someone the prisoner LIKES, but the jailer MATTERS.

As Daw Suu Kyi and the Burmese puts so elegantly, to live in propinquity with someone who one does not love.

That boss who you hate, but who does your performance assessment? You don’t like him, BUT HE MATTERS.

That annoying family member who you loath, but whom your mother can’t seem to stop listening to? Well, SHE MATTERS.

I always like to think that we should spend less time trying to figure out the people who we like and who matter. After all, since we like them, we’ll put up with their nonsense anyway and if they like us back to some degree, they’ll put up with ours. But the people who we dislike or dislike us and MATTER?

PAY ATTENTION TO THEM.

So I found myself concluding my little explanation to the participants-to-be of my POWER BAZI:START UP beginner’s class as follows:

You may not understand them perfectly or completely, but you will certainly understand them BETTER and in a new light,  but more importantly, you will gain insight into who they truly are.

 

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NihXxEDFIBM