…or a bossy, overbearing bitch who thinks she knows everything. (See “I am a terrible BaZi Consultant“)

Well, we’ll talk about the overbearing bossy bitch another time. This week, let’s talk about the Male Chauvinist Pig BaZi consultant.

In the old days, it was UNTHINKABLE that women would be allowed to dabble in metaphysics. God forbid become BaZi consultants or even Feng Shui consultants. Nope.

For women, BaZi is not Destiny.

Biology. That’s Destiny.

Fortunately, the metaphysical world has moved on along with the rest of the world and, nowadays you have many female BaZi consultants (less in the Feng Shui world it would seem). In Hong Kong, it seems things are very even when it comes to female BaZi consultants.

I think it’s natural that there should be women in this field, given that a large proportion of the time, women are the ones likely to be seeking out advice these days.  That being said, from a practice standpoint, I see about an even number of males/females. Although I suppose even in the old days, men would not have called going to see a BaZi consultant to be “going to get advice”. They would have called it something else, as in the old days, seeing a BaZi sifu was for manly things like “finding out information about when I am going to get a promotion” or “how much longer do I have to be stuck in this position before I am promoted to the Emperor’s Number 1 Mandarin”  or “when will I find a wife because I really need someone to give me some kids because working the fields by myself is damn hard work”.

Manly important things. Indeed.

But I digress.

So your Bazi consultant is a male chauvinist pig. What do you do?

By the way, this assumes that you, the reader, are not a man.

My opinion on this is largely informed by two things in my view. First, I am of the view that a BaZi consultant is not an Oracle, although sometimes we do get ahead of ourselves a little here. Their word is not FINAL. And most of the time, their advice and the validity of their advice, is dependent on your goals and your actions. In short, they just talk the talk. YOU are the one who has to walk the walk.

Secondly, and as is quite self-evident, I happen to be an educated member of the XX gender. So I have very little respect (and heaps of scorn) for BaZi advice that is predicated on the extremely outdated, decidedly Confucian belief that:

1. Women require marriage (and children) in order to be fulfilled, completed, satisfied, happy, and not bitchy old crones.

2. Women are somehow inferior to men because our brain happens to be where it’s supposed to be.

3.Women need someone to take care of them, financially, put a roof over their heads, and occasionally buy them diamond rings.

4. A truly good female BaZi belongs to a female who does not have to work.

If you have any good ones that you’ve heard, please send them my way. I will add them to the list.

So, let’s deal with these in order, except (2) which obviously requires no further explaination.

Women require marriage (and children) in order to be fulfilled, completed, satisfied, happy, and not bitchy old crones.

Just like there are some charts where money buys happiness, in some charts, marriage does by happiness. In some charts, the Husband Element does indeed happen to hold the key to the person’s happiness and satisfaction in life. Certain Day Masters for example, do experience significant quality of life improvement as a result of marriage. Ji Earth and Gui Water Female Day Masters in particular.

However, guess what? The Star the represents the Husband Element, known as the Direct Officer 正 官 also represents a person’s boss or superior. (you can of course, kill two birds with one stone and marry your boss but I don’t advise it). So in fact, a woman who’s chart requires the Direct Officer star in which to experience an improvement to quality of life and general personal happiness, can actually obtain this effect by doing the unthinkable.

HAVING A CAREER. WORKING FOR SOMEONE. USING THE BRAINS SHE WAS GIVEN FOR THE BETTERMENT OF OTHERS, or maybe her wallet. The consumer economy needs support after all.

In les ancient times, working was not an option for women. Today, it is not the case.

So, far from the view that women need a husband in order to feel satisfied, contented and happier in life, you could have the same effect from a totally amazing, absolutely stonking, kick-ass job/career. Marriage is a CHOICE, because ladies, we have options. Which means that whomever you do pick to stroll down the aisle with should be someone you’re with for reasons other than frickin elemental necessity.

Here’s what that Male Chauvinist Pig BaZi Consultant probably didn’t mention. Sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander, except of course, the gander gets sauce with a splash of XO in it, according to the Old BaZi Consultants Club.

Some MALE charts only have their potential unlocked only after they’ve gotten married.

And even the guys have a choice. Money or Honey. This is because the star that represents the Spouse Element to a man, the Direct Wealth star 正 财, is also the element that represents actual money or assets or investments. So the guy could see his life improve, as his financial situation improves, whether or not he gets a wife to go with the nice house with the picket fence.

And equally, there are male charts where marriage isn’t actually the answer to happiness in life. To wit for these people, why on earth would marriage even be a requirement? Marriage, be it for a man or a woman, should be a choice. Not a necessity.

In the case of women, I highly discourage picking someone simply because you’ve decided you need a man to complete your life. I mean, unless it’s in your chart that you need a man (literally, and even then…see above), it really is external pressure that it is telling you a trip up the aisle is a necessity of life and that we all should just settle for whatever dead fish comes our way.

So on this point, check IGNORE on the advice unless you fall into the exceptions and tell the MCP to stuff it.

Women need someone to take care of them, financially, put a roof over their heads, and occasionally buy them diamond rings.

For this, I can do no better than to quote the great Beyonce:

The shoes on my feet
I’ve bought it
The clothes I’m wearing
I’ve bought it
The rock I’m rockin’
‘Cause I depend on me
If I wanted the watch you’re wearin’
I’ll buy it
The house I live in
I’ve bought it
The car I’m driving
I’ve bought it
I depend on me

So yeah, tell that MCP BaZi consultant to just STUFF IT.

A truly good female BaZi belongs to a female who does not have to work.

In the old days, a good chart was a chart where one was a wealthy landowner and had serfs to do the work. If you’re familiar with those endless recycled-plot TVB Cantonese serials, set in the turn of the century in China, on some wine-tea-leaf-lotus-roof plantation, you’ll know what I mean.

That is why the Resource Star 正 印 is traditionally regarded as a good star when it comes to the conventional outlook on BaZi. (the ‘occasionally’ used modern reference of the Resource Star is ‘laid-back’).

So guess what – in both male and female charts, not having to actually WORK was considered a good thing. Having other people to do stuff for you, was a good thing. Having money to spend, status and reputation was THE LIFE. And most of the time, people inherited this rather than actually achieved it.

In modern times, although inherited wealth does account still for a number of wealthy people in this world, that is rapidly changing.

I take the view that CHOOSING not to work is not the same as not being able to work therefore not having to work. Please also remember in the old days, women didn’t have much choice in terms of the types of jobs they could do. They were not allowed to engage in the family business, not allowed to trade or be merchants, and certainly not allowed to become Imperial employees unless they were ’employed’ in the harem. Being a scholar, an artist, or a general was obviously also out. So pretty much in the old days, if you had to work as a woman, you were either a servant, a farmer or a harlot.

These days, obviously it is not the case. And so why should the conventional wisdom apply?

So as you can see, a good number of the reasons that Male BaZi consultants put forth when it comes to advocating marriage or the necessity of marriage stems from their on old-fashioned outrageously outdated thinking.

So the next time you see a male BaZi consultant and he gives you the whole ‘get married is better spiel’…

SAY IT WITH ME LADIES.

Stuff it ya old coot.